Things i have to do though i dun want to do..

first things
i have been aware of what people have been saying for quite a while even before OGL camp. as usual, my intel network is still damm good :) thanks for the info. but ya.. back to the thing.. i guess some people see my presense as a threat more than a senior. some people say that i make them feel small and useless. while, i have been thinking about it for a very very long time and i guess it isnt the words i use or the actions i take but rather, its the people who said it. people who think that they are good enough will see better people and think of them as a threat cos they are not growing anymore. they do not try to conquer their fears and see it as a target to beat. they dun try.. they rather hide in their small group and have small talks about other people. and by doing so they cause themselves to rift apart from the rest whom they feel is "under my protection". if you cant handle being told you are wrong and you dun want to try to grow or dun have the balls to try to take me down then i look down on you.

a quote i once read "you will miss 100% of the shots,you dun take."

i know i am causing a rift just by being back, i know that some people just cant handle the way i do things, they cant think as fast, they cant handle me pushing them, they dun want to live up to any expectations, they just want to be them, not any better. i look down on these people.

to the rest who are not like that: "theres always going to be another mountain, i am always going to try to make it move.

second thing
i am extremely disappointted in some people. just because i am gone. they start falling apart. they dont try to stand up to all the things on their own or with their team. everything i have said has been thrown into the drain. sometimes i feel that, people who have no confidence and jsut lay down and die, should really lay down and die. this is a fight, like it or not this is the best way for you to improve. to keep pushing yourself to the limits, to keep working till you fall and then get back up again. that is the way to improve. to get scolded and scolded and learn where you go wrong. that is the things you should be doing. and not thinking huh.. but if i do this.. i do that.. thinking is for people with good brains.

next thing
some people say i am selecting excos, what a joke.. one of the people with the least right to make any sort of decision in this club, gets to choose excos. a serious joke..

lastly..
i always view my self as the lousiest of my team. i am loud, needs controlling, do too much, play too much, think too much and all i think i am good for is DOING things. so i challenage everyone of you, to try to climb up to where we are.. if you cant even be better than me, you dun deserve my respect.

The bravest warrior is not the one who slays the dragon but the one who keeps trying..
Its not about how many times you get knocked down, its how many times you get up.

its not like i want to leave this club but its more like i have to. but i guess i will be back some day..