The face behind the mask..

yes i am not willing to let you all see the sad me

its true i am not over her

i am not ready for anything i guess..

i was too used to your love that i cant survive without it

i am broken..

but hey everyone, i am a happy fool...

at least to you all

so dun worry alright ??

let me be..

i am looking for excuses...

Black Eyed Peas Alive lyrics found on
http://www.directlyrics.com.com/black-eyed-peas-alive-lyrics.html

I got so much love
For you darlin' and i,
I wanna let you know how I feel

And its true that I love you
And it's true your the only one and I do,
I adore you
And its true girl

You make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x

[Fergie]
You said - you said - you said
That im the only one
You said that im your number 1
Now your gone and I feel numb
Tell me where do we go wrong
You are my best friend and boyfriend
Now its seems like you're my worst friend
I gotta do soul searching
Without you im a whole different person
I aint acting like I used to
I don't feel loved like I used to
It was your love I was used to
Why do I had to lo-lo-lo-lose
Your love your love your love
Your love is what it was
That have me feeling **bust**
***you are my true love***

[will.i.am]
And its true that I love you
And it's true your the only one and I do
I adore you
And its true girl

You make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x
[apl.de.ap]
Hey girl ur the only one
**must** be my number one
Now your gone I feel so numb
Tell me how do we go wrong
First friends then we became best-friend
You used to be my girlfriend
Now your my worst friend
Yeah I gotta do a lil soul searching
Without you im a whole different person

I don't even act like I used to
I don't even feel loved like I used to
I guess its your love that I used to
And I feel bad that I lose you
I get so many things that I wanna sa-sa-sa-sa...
I guess this mean that im missing you
Sorry for the things that I did to you
Im so lost without you

[will.i.am]
And its true that I love you
And it's true your the only one and I do,
I adore you
And its true girl

U make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x

[fergie / will.i.am]
La di di da la di da la da
La di da la di da
La di di da la di da la da
La di da la di da

I got so much love

La di di da la di da la da
La di da la di da

I got so much love

La di di di di di di di da la la la la

...i adore u and its true girl

You make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x

[taboo]
So easy to fall in love with u
And all the things that u do
Baby girl ur so remarkable
So special, so wonderful
So special, so wonderful
So special, so wonderful

Baby girl ur so remarkable
So spesh-al-al-al-al-al-al

rainy makes my smile go away..

i need something to do, i cant go out if its rainy and everyone seems to be busy so i started thinking..

since the break up, i have changed alot.

lost alot but also gained back alot.

my true friends are here for me.

the rest are as usual, there when theres a party.

the dreams i have are they going to come true ?

i am fighting very hard for them but its days like this, god tells me i need a rest..

more things are on my mind now..

next promotion is in 2 months that means more responsibilities

next meet up should be in june, got to get the people informed

hui ze is flying off for a month

mr hang is off on friday, means no testimonial

ice queen is busy with her exams, means no one to give me that slap that i need

XX is also busy with exams means no dose of funny comments

distraction 2 has declared that she wants to be single

distraction 1 most probably isnt interested too

i got my strength back but not my stamina, thiam wei and dorc said that they will train with me. hope to gain my lost confidence too

christine is still in my wallet, havent found a box to put everything in yet

my phone plan is still my old one, gotta change it soon..

matthew chan is being a super nice guy by listening to my rants

no idea what to say to rachelle..

planning for a long weekend next week

siti is almost non-existent in my life

so is pat..

wonder how connie and li juan is doing..

wondering when can i have a sunny day to play some ball

why did stephen sign on

where is andrew right now

can we pass the mosquito check next week ??

why are my weekends so empty

is mum having fun in beijing

why is it life is so much easier when i was a bastard

will my knee ever stop hurting

i need to control my finances for the next 2 weeks

i miss the clubroom

i miss hugging fai fai..

which part of my grand plan am i at now, its been so long that i forgot..

i hope max and veron stay together

i hope jana doesnt become like her boss

XX, dorc, li juan all asked me to go the BBQ next week, but i am not invited should i go ??

wondering how is john's father

wondering if joshua can handle the new load

hai~ so many thoughts till i think i still have some but cant remember.
talk about penning down your thoughts

good bye for now, see you all when i blog again

Screwed up...

i think i screwed up a little..

going in way too fast, not everyone is me..

got to maintain professional..

but remember its not a game..

i just want to get to know you better

You think you are a hero but you are nothing but a zero..


i know very well i still am not ok with all this..

god i just pray for her well being..

finally home again..

last night was a horror..

tonight should be good..

tmr will be better...

just me and my bed for now..

nights..

dun mind me, i am sick again..

i am back..

back from 1 week of stay in..

i thought about things alot the last week..

i really want you to be happy so..

i know i am doing the right thing praying for your happiness..

i really hope that he loves you more than i do..

cos you deserve it.

i am not a good bf, i know..

hai~ just.. be happy..